November 17, 2012

Babies, babies!; we need babies!

Can you please bring your baby to Gaza? We need babies so CNN can say "Israel killed cameraman's baby." 

We also need a big pregnant woman, so CNN can say "Israel killed woman pregnant with triplets. One had Downs syndrome, one was Autistic, and one had ADD."

We also need a 3 year old in a wheelchair, so CNN can say "Israel killed 3 year old in wheelchair. Frantic mom is looking all over for the 'American Girl' doll blown away by the blast. She just spent 35 dollars and fifty cents to have the hair of the doll done."

We also need a vegetarian, so CNN can say "Israel killed a vegetarian. The truth is that vegetarians are bad for Global Warming, because they eat a lot of beans, and give out a lot of hot gas." 

We also need a Lesbian rabbi, so CNN can say "Israel killed a Lesbian rabbi, who gave all her congregants a peek at the burning bush."

We also need a non-smoking gay rabbi, so CNN can say "Israel killed a non-smoking gay rabbi, who only ate low fat, and who was so humble that he only entered from the rear."

We also need a Hollywood actress, so CNN can say "Israel killed a Hollywood actress, who cut down 37,000 trees to build her house, and who had sex with all the workers."

We also need a Transvestite or Androygenous, so CNN can say "Israel kills men and women together without mercy."

We also need a Ivy League college student, so CNN can say "Israel killed an Ivy League college student in the flower of his youth, while he was studying the impact of Slurpee's and condoms on the environment." 

Oh! I forgot the feminist. We also need a feminist, so CNN can say "Israel killed a Doctor, a lawyer, and a Rabbi, while she was putting on Tefillin. Israel did not leave over any orphans because she already killed them with an abortion."

OY vey! Man zeen shloymele vet zan a yusem! Oy vey! Oy vay!   NAAAAA!   Ert dech owch geharget veren!  (From Zemel)