July 29, 2012

Gay Hamon Gog (part 2)

As you well know, I'm coming out of the closet. I'm an official wife-swapper. I love other people's wives. I was thinking of going OTD, but then I said, hay! Wait a minute! Why can't everyone accept me as I am, as an orthodox Jew? So what if I'm a wife-swapper. I was born like that. (It's not my problem, It's G-d's problem). If everyone can accept people who talk Lashon Hora and cheat in business as orthodox Jews, why can't they accept me as an orthodox Jew?

It's a big chutzpa that the kids run after me calling me "de ugerisiner feeerd, uux, behaimah, tipish, chazzer." What a chutzpa! I had no choice! I was born like that! Don't people have any feelings? 

Well, I'm sick and tired of all the abuse, so we will be making a wife-swapping pride parade down 13th Av, and anyone who brings a hotel receipt from 6-12 pm, (When they were supposed to be finishing up work), or a certificate that they have AIDS, or STD, will get a free hot dog, including mustard and sauerkraut. And if they can bring a picture we will even throw in a pickle. 

All the food will be chasidishe shchita, and the atmosphere will be techno-wife-swapping-chasidish. That's it! I had enough abuse! There is no reason why I can't keep my pride as an orthodox Jew, especially since I only eat chasidishe shchita.(Click May 10 2012, July 5, Feb 5)